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Motherfucker: Part 3

This is the continuation of the story about the various strange and unexpected events that took place during my second trip to visit Mom in her hometown.

Sex Joke

SEX ON MARS

The year is 2222 and Mike and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough frequent flier miles. They meet a Martian couple begin talking about all sorts of things. Mike asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers, how they make money, etc. Finally. Maureen brings up the subject of sex. “Just how do you guys do it?” asks Maureen.
The Martian responds, “Pretty much the way you do.”
A discussion ensues and finally the couples decide to swap partners for the night and experience one another. Maureen and the male Martian go off to a bedroom where the Martian strips. He’s got only a teeny weenie member…about half an inch long and just a quarter inch thick.
“I don’t think this is going to work,” says Maureen.
“Why?” he asks, “What’s the matter?”
“Well,” she replies, “it’s just not long enough to reach me!”
“No problem,” he says, and proceeds to slap his forehead with his palm. With each slap of his forehead, his member grows until it’s quite impressively long.
“Well,” she says, “That’s quite impressive, but it is still narrow.”
“No problem,” he says, and starts pulling his ears. With each pull, his member grows wider and wider until the entire measurement is extremely exciting to the woman.
“Wow!” she exclaims, as they fell into bed and made mad, passionate love.
The next day the couples rejoin their normal partners and go their separate ways. As they walk along, Mike asks, “Well, was it any good?”
“I hate to say it,” says Maureen, “but it was pretty wonderful. How about you?”
“It was horrible,” he replies, “all I got was a headache… She kept slapping my forehead and pulling my ears.”

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Fantasm

Can’t Rape the Willing

He put a blind fold over my eyes, tied my hands behind my back, tied my feet together and throws me over his shoulder like he didn’t care. While he was trying to unlock the door, I was trying to twist my way from him, but more I twisted the tighter he held me, to my surprise his strength was amazing. As he opens the door he throws me hard on the bed, as I was laying there trying to figure out how to escape, I heard him closing the door and locking it. He throw is keys down on the table, and I hear him to unbuckle his belt.
I was scared, excited, and confused. I was scared because I didn’t know this men, he took me to a place I didn’t recognize, and I wasn’t sure what he was going to do to me. He also reeked of whiskey and smoke. I was wondering if this man just came from a bar and want a good time or what. I was excited for the fact I didn’t know what this man going to do to me? Is he going to raped me or what? I was confused for the fact this man seemed so familiar, his smell, and body. Did someone hired him to kidnap me, or was he just some stranger that was looking to get his kicks on, or just wanted to rape some female? My Master knew my fantasies, dreams, wants, desires: he knew that I wanted to be kidnapped and raped. But it was just a fantasy, and I didn’t think that he would go though, and if he did I would have been him or one his friends, not some stranger, or did he hire someone?
Just thinking about what he was doing to me, I was getting terrified by the moment, and at the same time I was getting hornier, hot, and wet. I felt my pulse racing, my breathing getting heavier, I wanted to scream, but there was a gag over my mouth. I had to do something.
The room was cold and there was a slight breeze. I had goose bumps forming on my body, my nipples where get harder. But at the same time I was sweating, a cold sweat. I could feel the sweat rolling down my cheeks. What the hell is going on here? I didn’t hear any thing for a while, I thought maybe that he fell a sleep or went to the bathroom, so I thought this was the best time to get free. So I tried to twist my hands free, but the more I moved my hands, the more the rope got tighter; I was trying to scream as loud and as hard as possible. Suddenly I heard him tell me to “shut the hell up and be still or else”. I was thinking: was he really going to hurt, maybe he was all bark and no bit? So I screamed and moved as much as possible. I was trying to get the gag out of my mouth.
But some how, he rigged that too, the harder I pushed on my gag, the harder it got. Then I felt a sudden sharp slapped right across my face. “I See we have a smart ass in here, we will fixed that.” He hit me, how dare him! The only person that is aloud the hit me is my Master, unless he gave permission to someone. Now I had the feeling the Master hired someone. I just wished that he gave me some kind of hint or notice that to watch my back, that his friends where planning something for me. But I was expecting too much.
He said also said “we”, who the hell was thee other person, I didn’t hear anyone with us and I didn’t hear anyone else in the room, but at the same times I didn’t see anyone, because I was blind folded. I was now getting petrified, for the reason that I knew there was another person with us. What are these people going to do to me? Are they going to raped then kill me or use me for their own personal usage?
I hear him grab his belt from the table, he walked over to be and suddenly he flipped me over on my stomach and started to beat my ass with his belt. I felt my ass was turning red and I felt the welts growing, the harder he hit the worse it felt. He started to untie my feet: as he started to untie my feet I started to kick him as a hard as I could just to get away, but the harder I kicked the harder he hit me with is belt. I had to quit and still I was starting to hurt and I started to cry in pain. I feel him reach under me and start unbuckling my pants and sliding them off of me with my underwear.
I felt warm air going across my pussy, suddenly I felt him putting his fingers in my pussy, then one up my ass. “I see someone is tight and wet. I think we should loosen that ass up, what do you think my friend?” He flipped me back over on my back, grabbed my feet and starts to tie them to the bed post. I felt him sit on my chest and straddle me down; it made it harder for me the breath. He untied my hands from behind my back and retied them to the bed. Then he started to unbutton my shirt slowly, “Fuck it” he said out loud. I heard him take out his knife and start cutting of the button of my shirt, and then he cut my bra loose exposing my breast. He took his knife and ran the cold blade across down my face, my neck, and then down my breast and circling my nipples.
Chills ran down my body in cold and in fear. Then he put down is knife besides me and he cupped his hands over my breast, and started thumbing my nipples. OMG that felt so good, his warm hands on my breast and my nipples. Then suddenly I felt someone else running their hands up my thighs, and slowly moving their hands up to my pussy, and I felt this person slowly kissing my thighs and my labia. I finely heard his deep voice.
“What do you think we should do next?” still kissing my thighs.
“I think we need to take the rest of her clothing off, put something up her tight ass and pussy, and go on from there. What do you think?”
“You’re right; it’s no fun if she still has her clothing on.”
“We also have to do something about her tight holes.”
“Oh don’t worry; I have something plan to loosen her up.”
“What ever you say man, I trust you.”
They sat me up and unbound my hands; then they took of my shirt and my bra. I felt someone sitting and reaching from behind me and pulling my nipples. Then other man takes off my gag and grabs my face and started to kiss me. I pulled my head away from him as fast and hard as I could. He grab me again and try kissing me, I did the same thing. As I pulled away I felt back of his hand slap my face.
“Knock it off, the next time I will hit you harder, do you understand me?”
“Fuck you, someone is going to start looking for me and find me.”
Someone slapped me.
“No they won’t, no one cares about you, who wants a whore like you?”
“I am not a whore! You… you just wait someone will look for me.” I feel a sudden sharp blow to my face, before I could finish what I was going to say. This time he split my lip, and my eye started to swell. I felt blood oozing from my lip. I know he (they) meant business this time. I also knew that we were right, no one will be looking for me for a while, and my Master is out on business. So I had to do something, try to get away or just let them do what ever to me. I didn’t know what to do, but I had to do something.
As soon as I felt the blood going down my lip, I started to feel the pain on my face. I tried to get back the tears, but I couldn’t. I felt someone touch my face. He came close to my ear and whispered. “If you do what we say you will not get slapped again, you under stand me?” He said with a firm voice. “Yes, I understand.” I whispered back, trying not to cry. By the way, before we do anything with you I think that we should clean that mess up? We’ll clean her lip and put supper glue on it, and that should feel real good.” He handed me something cold to put on my cheek.
“Keeps you’re lips separate for a few minutes so they don’t glue them selves together, we don’t want that, we want to use them later.”
“Yeah we don’t want that to happen.” I said with a sarcastic remark.
“Don’t be a smart ass, and by the way Master Mark won’t be happy with you if he knew that you where misbehaving.” Someone said with a deep voice.
I took a deep breath, as I heard that they where working for Master Mark. I felt a sudden sting on my lip, then the smell of supper glue, man that stung like a SOB, but after a minute the hurting. I felt someone blowing on my lip the kiss me gently. “Does that feel better?” Someone said
“Yes and thank you. I have a question you?”
“Yes”
“If Master Mark knows that you have me, why can’t I see you or know my names?” I said softly and nervously.
“Well my dear, its no fun if you know we are going to do to you, and for our names you can me Snake and that guy sitting behind you with the firm sexy voice… you can call him Rex. Now little lady I don’t want to hear another word from unless you’re told to and you call us Sirs. Understand?”
“Yes”
“Now open wide”
He took my face again and I felt his thick, long cock being slid in between my lips, the heat from his rod against my face and mouth…. I was breathing through my nose now, secretly enjoying the taste of his massive cock, the feeling of it sliding in and out of my mouth. While he was fucking my mouth thee other guy put one hand on my breasts and his other playing with my clit. OMG I was feeling so good at that point. I could feel Rex’s cock getting harder and starting to pulse in his pants. I was getting wetter by the second. I can’t fight the pleasure anymore and let out a moan around his length, panting through my nose and lifting my head up to meet his thrusts, opening my throat to take him deeper with every thrust…Soon he’s fucking my mouth with his lustful abandon, I can feel him take his other hand and move it behind my head so that he can straddle my face and fuck my mouth fully…He kneeling around me, guiding his long throbbing cock into my mouth and pumping down my throat, his smooth, heavy balls slapping against my chin with his thrusting….He pulls his meaty tool from my mouth and slaps it on my face, making my cheeks wet with pre- cum and spit as he stands up and moves down to my spread legs…I was panting with anticipation, enjoying the taste of his pre-cum on my lips, trying to keep myself from begging him to fuck me….
I felt both of the men get off the bed. I fell down on the bed when Rex moved from behind me. I wish my hands where free, so I could play with my self. So I laid there with anticipation that one or both of the guys would fuck me or just let me go. Suddenly I felt someone spreading my legs apart, and then putting an ice cold toy up my pussy. I suddenly tried to close my legs as quick as possible, and trying to push that toy out. But something was holding my legs open.
“Relax” Snake whispered in my ear. “The more you relax, the less it’s going to hurt.” Tears started to weld up in my eyes. I was scared that they are going to hurt me even worse.
“Stop crying, there is no reason for you to cry, we haven’t done anything to you yet.” Snake said out loud.
“Why should I stop? I don’t know where the hell I am, and I don’t know what you are going to do to me. And by the way, and am FUCKING COLD.” I said whimpering
“I warned you to relax, its going to hurt.” Rex said
I experience a sudden sharp slap across my face. I felt the hot welt growing on my face. It felt worse then before. It felt like he hit me in the same place where punch me. “What the hell was that for?” There was no answer. I waited for a minute “Answer me God Dam It, what the hell was that slap for?” I was starting to get pissed, and suddenly I felt something hard and cold going up my ass. I was trying to reject it. But the more I was trying to close my legs or try to push it, the harder he push, and more pain I was in. So I had no choice but to relax and take the pain. He made sure that I felt every inch of the cold rod go in me. Now the bad thing was: I was cold inside but out side my body. I thought I was never going to get warm.
“I told you to relax, didn’t I? Now you are going to pay for it” Rex said in a sharp deep voice.
I Rex’s warm hard craps my breast and thumbing my nipples. Then he leaned over me and started sucking on them. His hot body felt good over my blistering cold body. As soon I started to enjoy his lips and tongue over my nipples, I felt him grab something and place them on my nipples and my clit. The clamps hurt for a moment, then I was started to get excited, I felt him turn them on. It wasn’t bad on my nipples, but he put a clamp on my clit and turned it on… that drove me up the wall. I couldn’t resist it any more; I had to let it out. “Oh My God.” Then he had to turn up the vibration. I twisted the ropes around my hands. I was ready to explode, and they knew it.
They wanted me to just explode. I felt someone making the clamps on my nipples go tighter. Then I felt someone rubbing and kissing my body. “Do you want our cocks; do you want to be our slaves?” Snake whisper in my ear.
“Yes” I whisper back.
“Yes what, I want to hear it out of your mouth.” I was ready to explode any minute. I couldn’t take it any more, I just wanted to cum. I wanted them stick their cocks in my pussy. “I want your cocks, I want you to fuck me, and I want to be your slave.” I said out loud.
I grab the ropes harder, throw my head back, and arched my back, “Fuck me.” I screamed. “Please fuck me.” Suddenly I felt the one thing… It wasn’t their cocks I was another toy. An ice cold toy, once he stuck that toy in me, I exploded. I screamed. “OMG” It was the best orgasm I ever had.
They turned off the clamps and took the off. One at a time. First the left nipple then the right. He ran his hand slowly down my body, then he tapped that clamp on my clit, I jumped. “Just take it off please.” I whimpered. I was laying there having after shocks. I felt someone else placing their hand of my thigh, and laugh. They knew that they are driving me up the wall. The more I jumped, the more they enjoyed it. The more it drove me up the wall.
“Are you sure you want to be our slave?” Rex Said
“Yes, I want to be your slave.” Breathing heavenly, I was willing to do anything to get their cocks in me and that dam clamp off of my clit.
“You have to call us Master’s now. Understand?” Rex said
“Yes”
“Yes, what?” Snake said with a firm voice
“Yes… Master”
“Good girl, each time you don’t call one of us Master or don’t listen to us, you will get discipline. Understand?” Rex said
“Yes Master”
“Since you understand that, we will take off you blind fold”
I was still weak and jumpy from my earth shattering orgasm. All I wanted to do it pass out and relax, but I knew I can’t do anything without their permission. I felt someone running their hand over my face, sliding their hand under my blind fold and take it off. I had the blind fold on forever it seemed. So when he took it off, it was dark. I thought my eyes where playing tricks on me, or some how they slip me some drugs. But I was looking around a little harder and I notice that the only light in the room was candles.
I felt the bed shake, I look over and I saw one of the men kneeling besides me stroking his cock. I heard a deep voice say “Open your mouth.” With a deep voice, this must have been Rex. He grabs a hold of nap of my neck, and made my head go back. He smacked me with his cock a few times.
“Open your mouth” Rex said with a firm voice
Then I felt him strangle me down and stuck his robust cock in my mouth. He pulled my head up, and he started to fuck my mouth slowly, like he was teasing me. Then he stuck a pillow under my neck, and grab me with both of his hands and started fucking my mouth harder and hard. My noise started to bleed and he didn’t care. I could feel his cock getting harder and harder in my mouth, it was almost too big for my mouth, my jaw started to hurt. Suddenly he took his cock out of my mouth and smacked me hard across the face.
“What the hell was that for?” I yelled, and then I felt another sharp smack across my face. “What the hell, what am I doing wrong?” I started to cry. My nose was bleeding harder; I could taste the blood on my lips, and down my throat
“For one, you started to bit me, for two you didn’t call me Master.” Rex said
“I am sorry if my mouth is too small for you large cock, Master”
“Don’t be a smart ass. I don’t like smart asses” Rex said
“I wasn’t being a smart ass Master” tears filled my eyes; my face was still hurting from the first when he smacked me. He was looking straight in my eyes with a mean look. I guess I really got my self in trouble.
“God you’re a mess, well since you’re tied up, I will clean you up some, what the hell I will just leave you how you are, and I’m not done with you anyways.”
He tilted my head back again; I could taste and feel the blood draining down my throat, I was also having hard time breathing with him sitting on my chest and my nose stuffed up. He stuck his large, half hard cock back in my mouth. Then he grabbed a fist full of my hair and pulled my head up to make it easier to fuck my mouth. He started fucking my mouth slowly then faster and faster. I started to gag some, the spit was running down my chain and down is sweaty balls. Suddenly I felt I heard him moan, his cock started to pulse. Now I know he is ready to cum… cum hard, and I was in trouble. I felt him shove his cock further down my throat. I tried to push him back, but it didn’t work. “Look up at me whore” as soon as I looked up at him, I felt shoot a large load in my mouth. “Swallow it all, and make sure he is clean” he withdraws his cock some so I could swallow. But I didn’t want to, but I had no choice. “Swallow” he said with unforgiving to his voice.
He was looking me straight in thee eyes, I know he meant business. I was trying to take his cock out of my mouth so it would be easier for me to swallow, but for some reason he didn’t want that to happen, each time I pulled my head back he would push my head back. Finely I had to swallow. It wasn’t bad, but there was a lot of cum there, and it was thick. He finely took his cock out of my mouth. Thank God! My jaw was starting to hurt. Finely I felt something hot shoot across my face, and in my mouth. Snake finely shot his load all over my face. Gross I hate cum on my face. But I didn’t care at this point I was tired, sore, and dirty. All I wanted was a shower or really a hot bath.
“I guess we can untie her for a while boss and give her a bath?” Snake said with sarcasm
“Not a bad idea Snake, Guess what I already have a bath ready for her, and I have a few other surprises ready for her too, she is going to be all clean, when we are done with her.”
Well I guess I am getting a bath, but I think I am going to get more then what I want….

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True Story

Pimped by Brother-In-Law 1

Hi everyone, this is taneesha shah, 28-year-old housewife, I am 5 ft 7” and my stats are 36c 30 38 and I would like to tell you how I got was pimped during a marriage by a cousin of my husband. It happened about 6 months ago, when Rohan (the brother in law) was visiting town for the marriage.

True Story

My private times with my wife’s hot 18 year old cousin Jamie

…
Jamie was my wife’s 18 year old first cousin, fresh out of high school, on her first summer vacation after graduating. She used to come over and stay the night (or sometimes the whole weekend) quite often, over the last couple of years.. She was an average looking girl to most people, but to me– hotness is measured on how you look dressed down… Is she still hot in a pair of yoga sweat pants, no makeup, and her hair in a ponytail? Jamie (5′ 2″ tall, 110 lbs, little B cups about the size of an orange) had curves in all the right places… She was WAY above average to me in that category.. I had seen her several times in a bikini at the beach, cheerleader skirt outfit, tight little volleyball shorts… She had developed into a woman who had the body of a Goddess, and the face of an angel…. 
 I had watched her grow up since she was 11 years old, and had always thought she was a beautiful young girl.. She had always taken a liking to my wife and I …, probably because we let her drink, smoke, and get high with us. Her home life was pretty messed up, mainly because her parents were divorced– and she lived with her Mom, who had a new boyfriend living in the house. She didn’t like this guy telling her what to do, she was a rebellious girl, and had been sexually active with boys since she was 15… (I’ll explain the details in a few minutes)
My thoughts building up to what eventually happened consensually between us were immeasurable. I wanted her so bad. Every time I saw her, heard her voice on the phone, or even heard mention of her name– my imagination raced thoughts through my mind of what it would be like to have my way with her,  if even only for a few minutes. I remember on several occasions watching her sleep across the room on the couch, while I was laid back in the recliner with a thin blanket over me. She would fall asleep watching tv, and I would pull out my cock and jerk off while I watched her sleep. I got quite daring once, being that I went in her overnight bag and got her panties (that she had wrapped up with her other clothes) in a towel from when she had took a shower earlier. They were a pair of little yellow cotton thongs, with green outer stitching, and a little green cartoon frog on the front. I remember watching her sleep– smelling her beautiful young scent, holding her dirty panties across my face. My cock would get so hard just thinking what it would be like to fuck that tight little teenage pussy. I would  rub her panties all over my chin, mouth, and nose– just trying to savor anything I could, to add to my racing thoughts of wanting to fuck her….. I also remember being so excited, I went into the bathroom and took off my boxers. I put my pajama pants back on commando…, and sat back in the chair while I made sure she was sleeping soundly… After waiting a few minutes, and jerking myself off to get my cock up as hard as I could, I got up slowly, walked quietly over to the couch were she was sleeping— and stroked my manhood just inches from her pretty young face. 
“ohhhh Jamie, I want you so bad”, I whispered quietly–  but careful not to wake her… I closed my eyes for a few seconds, gripping my cock tighter– imagining just how tight that little pussy must be… Her long blond hair, her Irish green eyes, her cute little flirty smile.. It all was too much for me to handle at once…. I was about to explode….. I had set her panties down alongside the recliner next to the wall..  I quickly bent down and grabbed them,  and just as i stood up, my balls had that familiar tingle….. I felt it climbing….. and I drenched her sexy little frog panties in my hand with erupting hot streams of cum. I was standing about 2 feet back from her face, right in line with her tits. I had to stay quiet…. I just didn’t know what her reaction would be if she woke to see me jerking my cock right in front of her…
After putting myself in a dilemma with these cum soaked panties I had in my hand at 3 am. I had to figure out a way to wash them, dry them, and get them back in her bag before she woke up… I rinsed them in the bathroom sink, washed them out with hand soap— rinsed them again, then wrung them out. I couldn’t turn on the dryer, it would wake up the whole house. So I opened them up and set them up on top the kitchen wall cabinet, out of sight….
Well, needless to say— the morning was hectic, and I wasn’t able to put her panties back in her overnight bag before she left.. I was so worried she would find out, or even call and ask my wife if she saw them… Over the next few weeks, she would just call here and there, not giving any clue if she just threw the towel with the clothes inside straight in the washer, or she directly knew her panties were missing…. Well come to find out— she did have an idea her panties didn’t come home with her from her overnight stay at our house… (more about that in part 2)
How this all came to be (building this up to the best part)-is that I used to work a 4 to midnight shift at my job, about 30 minutes away. My wife would have to get the kids up and ready for school in the morning, so most of the time she would be already sleeping when I got home… I had the whole house to myself when Jamie wasn’t there.. And when she was there, we would stay up ’till around 3 or 4 talking about whatever. I would drink a few beers with her, and she would loosen up. She would talk about her birth control pills, on how good she was about taking them on time– on how the boys she had “done it” with got to cum inside her, the different positions she had tried (acting them out with pillows).. I remember asking her if she had ever gone down on a boy, and she told me she had done that once.. “He spooged in my mouth and all over my face, It was so gross!” with the look on my face, I was trying hard to agree with her… “I told him to tell me when he was gonna……., you know?” it turned me on so much for her to talk about her sex life with me. I would get me so hard, and I would sometimes catch her eyes looking down at my cock bulging down the leg of my pants….
I was afraid to make a move on her, mainly because her and my wife were so close…. Along with the risk of getting caught. WHAT??? Did I really just say that? …..I lied to myself with these bullshit excuses for over 2 years…. The lust to fuck her grew so big inside my mind, It had to happen— I mean, show me an 18 year old girl who sits back and talks about anything and everything, with her cousin’s husband no less…. Details about how she doesn’t like the taste of cum, how she shaves herself down there, what positions she has tried (which wasn’t many)… I knew the offer was on the table. There was no doubt in my mind she wanted me to fuck her. She did everything but come out and plainly say it. She was dropping hints down like a thunderstorm….
Just to align everything together before we start the next chapter– I still have her little yellow frog panties, now hidden in my bedroom closet, that never made it back in Jamie’s overnight bag before she left to go back home. She hasn’t come back over for a few weeks, and now her calls are getting fewer and farther between. I was worried she knew someone had gone through her bag.. I was really mad at myself for fucking up a good thing. I thought she wasn’t ever going to stay over again..

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Fiction

Jenny by the river Part 2

Jenny Part 2
She was still gorgeous; the same short curly hair, blue eyes and freckles. I was still entranced. This time she wore tight jeans and a girly short sleeved shirt, I still couldn’t keep my eyes off her. And her cousin …………!!!!!!
About two months after my tryst with Jenny by the river, one Thursday evening the phone rang about 7.30. A feminine voice said “Hello, is that Geoff?” I said “Yes it is. Who’s that?” “It’s Jenny do you remember me?” “Of course I do Jenny. How are you?” “Not too bad, I’ve been trying to ring you but there’s been no answer.” “I’ve been away working Jenny, it’s great to hear your voice.” “I’d like to come and visit you Geoff, would that be OK?” “Yes I’d love that, when?” “Well, I’ll be in town this weekend. How about 10 o’clock on Saturday?” “OK, see you then.” We said good bye and hung up. I pictured her as I remembered her, really pretty, a sparkling personality, short curly blonde hair, tiny shorts and those TITS!!!
Two months ago we had a sexy afternoon by the river. I fucked her twice and gave her my number but then I left town to work the wheat harvest, and just got back last weekend. I do skilled farm work; driving machinery, handling sheep and cattle, fencing, etc, it’s hard work and keeps me very fit. The work is seasonal, but I’m well known and always welcome. The wheat harvest is long hours of hard work, living on site. Finally I was back in town, it was the summer holiday period and Jenny was in touch. That was exciting enough, but I had no idea what a surprise she had in store.
On Friday I caught up with housework, and had a few drinks at the pub. Some friends wanted me to come with them camping on the weekend, I just said I had plans. Saturday morning I put fresh sheets on the bed, cleaned my BMW motorbike and went inside for a coffee, then the doorbell sounded.
Jenny and I gazed at each other, grinning crazily. I could see her nipples pushing out the material of her shirt; she bounced in and impetuously jumped into my arms. I caught her and pushed the door shut as she wrapped her legs around my waist. She began kissing me passionately, so I put her against the wall and leaned on her, grinding my hardon against her pussy. Still kissing and tongue wrestling I carried her to the couch and sat down with her straddling my legs. We slowed the attack a little; I started stroking her back, sides, arms, face and legs. Jenny drew my hands to her breasts and ground her pussy against my cock. We pulled each other’s shirts off, Jenny wasn’t wearing a bra and she rubbed those magnificent tits against my hairy chest, I could feel her hard nipples. I squeezed her bum and she lifted her tits to my face. Jenny began panting and whimpering as I licked and lightly bit her nipples. She was writhing and groaning, it turned me on to the max. I lifted her and turned around, putting her on the couch, she kicked her shoes off. More passionate kissing followed, I rubbed my face around her breasts and belly and undid her jeans. Jenny lifted her arse as I peeled her jeans and panties completely off.
I could smell the scent of her pussy juice, Jenny smiled at me, her eyes alight. I gently pulled her legs apart and moved right in close. I grabbed her bottom and took a deep breath smelling her, then pulled her pussy to my mouth. I pushed my tongue into her vagina, tasting her. Then I moved my tongue up and down her inner lips and around above her clit licking the hood. Jenny moaned and squirmed on the couch thrusting her crotch up into my face. Her juices were flowing copiously, I licked her opening sucking in as much of her essence as I could, then began to tongue fuck her. She squealed in pleasure and pulled her legs up behind her arms. I pointed my tongue and worked it around her clit barely touching. I flicked my tongue tip back and forth across the top of the clit-hood, then sucked her clit and inner lips into my mouth, nursing on her, turning her on more. Next I changed back to tongue fucking, and then clit flicking back and forth, driving her arousal to greater heights.
Meanwhile I loosened my jeans and pushed them down. As Jenny became more and more aroused, so did I. My cock was as hard as it had ever been. As Jenny began to peak I got up on my knees and shoved my cock into her in one stroke, she screamed and hit her orgasm while I fucked her hard and fast. She bucked and thrust against me and I fucked her as hard as I could. As her orgasm subsided I slowed my movements but continued to fuck her deeply. Jenny slowly came down as I stroked my cock slowly in and out of her cunt. She opened her eyes, released her legs and we kissed gently. Jenny put her arms around my neck. With my cock stilled inside her, I lifted her from the couch and lowered her to the shag pile carpet. We lay in the missionary position for a while, kissing gently and getting our breath back. Realising we hadn’t spoken yet, I looked into her eyes and said “Hello”, we both laughed. “So”, I said “What have you been doing while I was away?” “Oh, nothing much,” she said, “School exams, visiting my cousin, Annie…” Jenny locked her eyes on mine and said “…getting on the pill.” “Really?” I was a bit surprised. Jenny said “I want you to cum inside me”.
I began to fuck her very slowly, with full length strokes. Keeping eye contact, I fucked her pussy real slow. Between strokes I ground, gently against her clit. She moved in time, pushing against me and closed her eyes, beginning to pant. I kept my movements slow, for a while then said “Let’s try some different positions.” “Ok” said Jenny. I withdrew and lay at her right side, with Jenny on her back. I lifted her right leg over both of mine and drew her left leg between my legs. Entering her wet pussy again, I fucked her slowly still, while stroking my right hand over her belly and tits, and tweaking her nipples. Jenny began to writhe and moan, I fucked her faster and harder. Sliding my hand down to her pussy I stroked two fingers up and down one each side of her clit-hood, while fucking her hard and fast. Jenny cried out and exploded in orgasm again. I held still while her orgasm subsided then pulled out, and guided her onto her knees and fucked her doggy style. Next I got a cushion and pushed her down onto her belly on the cushion. Forcing her legs wide apart with my knees, I thrust into her cunt once again. Putting my hands forward under her and grabbing her shoulders for leverage I fucked her with all my power, until my body locked tight and my cock blasted a river of cum right up inside her spasming cunt.
Trembling with spent passion we lay still on the floor, recovering our breath. “Oh God Geoff,” said Jenny “that was fantastic!!” I kissed the back of her neck, stroked her shoulders for a while then got up and led her to the shower. We washed each other gently, then dried off and got into my bed. We lay on our sides facing each other. Jenny put her upper arm around me and the other down between us and took hold of my cock. I put one arm beneath her head and the other around her, stroking her back. We kissed gently, tongues exploring. I felt really tender towards Jenny. With eyes closed I gently rubbed my cheeks and lips over her face. We just lay there kissing and touching for several minutes.
“How long are you in town?” I asked. “Just a few days, staying with my cousin Annie. I’m going on holiday with my family in a few days, and Mum wants me to come home on Monday.” “How long will you be away?” “Three weeks, we’re going hiking in Mt. Kosciosko National Park.” “I’ll miss you.” Jenny hit me on the arm and said “I’ve been missing you for two months!” I drew her close again, stroked her face and kissed her lovingly. I asked “How long do we have now?” Jenny said “I’ve got to go soon, Annie’s waiting for me at the Shopping centre. But I can come back after dinner. What time is it?” “It’s 12.30” “I’ve gotta go now! Drop me at the mall with your motorbike?” We got dressed and went to the door where I took Jenny in my arms and kissed her thoroughly.
On the bike she wore my spare helmet and we cruised through town to the shopping centre. When we stopped Jenny took the helmet off and asked “Is it ok for me to come back after dinner? Are you going out?” “I’m not going out, my friends have gone camping.” “Ok, I’ll see you later and I’ve got a surprise for you.” Jenny giggled and skipped away. I put the helmet on its hook and looked for her. Some distance away, near the entrance to the shops I saw Jenny with a tall black haired girl, they had their heads together obviously whispering. They looked my way, Jenny waved and both were smiling before they turned and went into the mall. The other girl looked back over her shoulder, before she went inside.
I rode out of town into the hills. BMW motorbikes handle really well and are an absolute joy to ride on winding roads. They are also very comfortable cruising. I took the tight twisting road south west towards the mountains and stopped for lunch at a nice café with a view over the hills towards Mt Bogong.
Over lunch I thought about Jenny and how I felt towards her; very tender and loving. But she’s very young, jailbait. Also she could easily be hurt, if she got too attached. And I could get too attached. The girl with black hair would be her cousin, but what was the surprise? After lunch I went the longer way back to Wodonga, along more winding roads through lower hills and farming land. That area is mostly cattle country, although I wasn’t watching the cows. I was thinking of my little filly, coming over again after dinner.
Back in town late afternoon, I put the bike in the garage and went for a walk. Then showered put on lounging pants and a tee shirt and made a meal of left-overs. I was sitting with a beer and listening to music when the doorbell rang about 8.15. Waiting outside were Jenny and the girl with black hair. They came inside and Jenny introduced her cousin Annie.
Now Jenny was cute as a button with gorgeous freckles, a magnificent figure, and a delightful personality. She was a fascinating young girl.
Annie was several inches taller, had long glistening black hair, bigger breasts, more developed in the hips. Amazingly attractive she looked like a young, taller, Kate Winslet. Jenny was obviously proud of her beautiful cousin. They both wore jeans that fitted well. Jenny had a white top and Annie wore dark blue. I looked them over and said “Well, I’ve never seen two more beautiful girls!” They both laughed Jenny took my arm and pressed her tits against me. She said “Annie’s the surprise.” My jaw fell open Jenny giggled and said “I told her about you and me weeks ago. She’s been wanting to meet you.” I didn’t know what to say, I felt nervous of their parents finding out. “Jenny you weren’t supposed to tell anyone!” “I know, but Annie’s my best friend, we share everything …… Every .. Thing!”
Annie came close to me, looking nervous and said “When Jenny told me about how you and she had such amazing sex, it really turned me on. I’m a virgin but … I really want to have sex and … if you like, … I think I’d like to try it with you.” I asked “Where do your parents think you are?” “At the movies, it’s a long show and they don’t expect us back till 11.30.” Jenny was still pressing her tits against my left arm. I looked at her, she smiled and nodded. I gazed into Annie’s eyes, fell in lust with her and smiled.
Annie slithered under my right arm and pressed her whole body against me. She was only a little shorter than me and kissing her hardly required any bending down at all. We kissed briefly, made eye contact again then locked lips passionately. I felt her body quiver against my side. I put my left arm around Jenny and kissed her too. My boner was at full mast. I kissed both girls, swapping back and forth. While kissing Annie, I turned my hips to Jenny and rubbed my tented pants against her belly. She rubbed her belly up and down against me. Swapping the kiss to Jenny I turned my crotch to Annie and rubbed against her. She gasped and put her hand down to feel my cock through my pants. Without undies my hard cock was obvious. Annie gripped my cock in her hand and squeezed. Jenny reached over and guided Annie’s hand inside my pants. She said “Take it in both hands and slide them up and down. Don’t squeeze hard.” Jenny pushed my pants down, Annie used both hands, her eyes were really big. Both girls knelt down and Jenny started telling Annie how to handle my cock. I was so turned on, I couldn’t speak.
Jenny took over from Annie and said “Try this.” She took my cock gently in both hands, lifted it and rubbed her face up and down the underside. “Your turn” Annie took my cock and rubbed the underside on her face then the end on her cheeks and forehead. Jenny said “Put it in your mouth like I told you yesterday.” Annie opened her mouth and slid half my shaft inside her soft velvety lips. “Go up and down slowly” said Jenny. Annie moved her head up and down experimenting with different pressure with her lips and tongue. My cock felt like it was on fire, I groaned out loud. Jenny said “See, he likes it! Put it in as far as you can.” Annie slowly pushed her mouth down my cock until I felt the back of her mouth. Her gag reflex kicked in and she pulled off quickly. Jenny said “Showing you is better than telling you” and slid her mouth down my cock as far as she could. Holding her fingers where her lips had gone to, she bobbed her head up and down slowly then faster and faster till I got close to cumming and told her to stop.
I kicked my pants off, took the girls into the bedroom, and told them to take each other’s tops off. They looked at each other then started on the buttons, with only a little hesitation. I wondered had they done this before? I knelt down and undid their jeans. First each button one by one then each zipper. Then bit by bit I worked each girl’s jeans down her legs, slowly revealing little knickers, Jenny’s white with frills, Annie’s black with embroidered edges. By this time all the shirt buttons were undone showing matching bras. The girls took turns pulling the other one’s shirt off her shoulders and arms, while gazing into each other’s eyes. Yes, I thought, they’ve been here before.
I pulled Jenny’s jeans right down and stroked her slender legs. While she stepped out of them, I pulled Annie’s down revealing long very smooth and shapely legs. I kissed and nuzzled her belly while she stepped out of her jeans.
I stood up and drew both girls to me into a hug, and then a three way kiss with four firm bra covered breasts pushing against my chest and my stiff cock nestled between two beautifully rounded bellies. We three French kissed passionately, my tongue going from mouth to mouth. While they kissed, I nuzzled their cheeks, necks and ears in turn. “Have you two had … sleep overs … together?” I asked, they both blushed and giggled. Jenny said “She’s got really big nipples.” Annie blushed; I smiled and kissed each of them deeply in turn. Putting my arms around Jenny I undid her bra and removed it. I took her breasts in my hands and put my face between them. I gently nuzzled her wonderful tits and sucked each nipple.
Then turning to Annie, I slowly embraced her and undid the clasp of her bra. Kissing her deeply, I kept her body against me and slid my hands up to her shoulders, pushing the bra straps onto her arms. I put my hands on her bra keeping it in place and stepped back a little. Her arms were by her sides. I kissed her again then looked at her chest and said “Well let’s see those big nipples”. I pulled the bra off showing a pair of perfectly placed C cup breasts, with pink areolas about two fingers wide and nipples as big as my thumb. The biggest nipples I have ever seen. Annie pulled her shoulders back presenting those magnificent breasts to my gaze proudly. I said “Wow”, reverently, looked at them for a while then began to fondle them with both hands. I stroked my palms and finger all over her tits, flicked the nipples with my thumbs then put my face in and nuzzled away. I was in heaven, Annie was breathing heavily.
I pulled both girls into another three way hug, kissing Jenny first, then both of them. They took turns rubbing my cock on the other one’s belly. I put my left hand on Jenny’s arse and my right hand on Annie’s, and (of course) there were two firm globes of bum flesh for each hand to enjoy. One crack for each set of fingers to explore and one crevice at the top of each pair of thighs to probe. I nuzzled all four tits in turn, sucked each nipple to full hardness, then got the girls to kneel down again. They held their breasts together while I rubbed my dick all over them, between them and turkey slapped each breast with my cock, making them jiggle.
Next I guided my cock to Annie’s mouth. She took the base in one hand and engulfed me, sliding her lips slowly down to her fingers. She slid slowly up again to the tip and moved one finger away on the way down, getting more of my cock into her mouth. Jenny said “I’ve heard that if you straighten your throat and swallow, you can get a guy’s cock all the way in.” Annie stopped and looked at her. “Try it” said Jenny “Put it in as far as you can, and pretend you’re swallowing some food or a drink.” Annie tried it but gagged and coughed. I said “Take a deep breath trough your nose, relax and just swallow without trying to push it in. Let the swallowing motion pull it in.” Two more tries and she got it, suddenly my cock eased into her throat. Annie eased it back into her mouth and I almost cum. I quickly withdrew from her mouth, panting and moaning, and squeezed my cock till the urge to ejaculate subsided. Annie asked “What’s wrong?” “Nothing honey, that was wonderful, but I almost cum in your mouth. You can’t do that without warning a girl.” “Why?” “Well, you might not like the taste, and if you’re not ready or don’t know what to do, my cum could go in your windpipe and you could choke on it.” She appeared to understand so I offered her my dick again. This time she swallowed it easily and was able to move it in and out of her throat several times. The feeling was incredible; I said “OH MY GOD, that feels so GOOD. I’LL CUM IF YOU DON’T STOP!!”
Annie pulled off me and Jenny wanted to try. She asked Annie how if felt, “It’s really strange, the trick is to take his cock in as far as comfortable, then swallow without pushing. Imagine you’re drinking from a water bottle and just swallow it.” Jenny looked up at me and said “I want you to cum in my mouth.” She took my cock in between her lips and slid down slowly, as far as she could. She took a breath through her nose then began swallowing. It felt amazing; each muscular swallowing motion moved the end of my cock in and out of her throat. Three swallows and Jenny had my cock all the way in, with her lips touching my balls. She eased me out into her mouth again, then swallowed me completely in one go. She eased my cock out of her throat again and took another breath. Then she grabbed my arse and pulled, fucking her own throat with my cock. I was on the edge of cumming right away, I grabbed her head and as my cum began to erupt, I thrust in as far as possible and sent spurt after spurt straight down her throat, while Jenny held my arse and pulled me hard into her mouth. Jenny eased my cock out of her throat into her mouth, and sucked the last of the cum from it. Her face was red as she got her breath back. I collapsed on the bed groaning. Annie said “That looked awesome.” She was clearly excited; I took her hand and pulled her onto the bed with me. Jenny came onto the bed too; I held her and kissed her thoroughly and said “That was unbelievable!!!”
Needing a recovery time I said “I’m thirsty, who wants a drink?” Annie said “Can we have a real drink” I asked “Have you had alcohol before?” “Yes we had some at a party, a few weeks ago” “Did you get drunk?” “Noo-oo?” It turned out that Annie had two Bacardi breezers, Jenny had three and got quite tipsy. They had slept over at Annie’s place and that’s when Jenny told her about me. I made a jug of Vodka and orange juice and poured three glasses. We sat up in bed sipping them. The girls finished theirs fairly quickly and were looking expectant, duty calls!
I drained my glass, put it down and drew them into a hug. Looking at Jenny I said “Annie first, ok?” She pouted a bit and Annie said “You had yours this morning, greedy bitch!!” I laughed and kissed them both, “Annie, you’re a virgin, have you had any sexy play with a boy?” “Well I’ve kissed a few boys, and let Kyle feel my boobs and pussy.” “Was that nice?” “Yes but he told his stupid mates, so I haven’t let him do anything since.” “Did he lick your pussy?” “No, Jenny’s told me about that.” Jenny squealed and said “Yes, that feels great. Do her!! Do her!!” I turned Annie onto her back and knelt over her with my knees each side of her hips, Jenny was very excited and lay on her side close to us.
Kissing Annie gently on the lips, I held my weight with one hand and stroked her tits and belly with the other. My cock and balls were lightly touching her thighs, and I began to rotate my hips to drag my cock up and down between them. Her big nipples were even bigger and hard, I pinched and flicked them with my fingertips. Annie was breathing harder and beginning to squirm beneath me. Jenny was watching and running one hand over my back. She rubbed my bum and balls then reached between us and grabbed my hardening cock. Jenny pushed my cock down between Annie’s thighs, Annie opened her legs to accept more of it then squeezed it firmly. Jenny started stroking Annie’s pussy. Annie began moaning, as I moved my mouth to her nipples. With my lips covering my teeth to imitate a baby’s gums I sucked and nibbled on those big nipples. Annie was now writhing, gasping and moaning loudly. I put my knees between her legs, then my right hand on her pussy; Jenny’s hand was still there stroking her pussy lips and clit. Annie opened her legs wide. My fingers went to the bottom of her slit while Jenny’s went to her clit and clit-hood. I gently pushed my index finger into her opening and stroked just inside on the g-spot, feeling the hymen with my fingertip. I lay down between her legs and brought my head down to her pussy, pushed Jenny’s hand away and began licking along her slit and around outside the clit-hood. Her pussy tasted delicious. Jenny grabbed Annie behind the knees and pulled her legs way apart and up to her armpits. Annie was crying out and humping her hips up and down as she reached a massive orgasm. Her pussy juice flowed copiously. I removed my finger and covered her whole pussy with my mouth. I tongue fucked her while sucking up all her juices. Annie quickly built to another huge orgasm and as she crested I moved up, put my hard cock to her opening and pushed straight into her.
Annie seemed to be passed out; I brought my knees up outside her hips and pushed my left arm under her shoulders keeping my weight off her. Jenny let go of Annie’s legs, I put my right arm around Jenny and kissed her on the lips. We looked at Annie and Jenny said “Wow. That looked amazing.” Annie put her arms around my neck then went still “Your cock is in me!” “Yes I did that while you were cumming.” Annie looked at Jenny “You were fingering me! And then you pulled my legs up.” Jenny said, “How did it feel?” Annie said, “I don’t know how to describe it. Thank you both. That was the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” Jenny and I both kissed her.
I said “We’re not finished yet.” Annie giggled, “Oh yes, you haven’t fucked me yet, have you.” I moved my cock in and out a little, “How does this feel, any pain?” “Yes, but not much. It feels good.” I stroked gently in and out watching her face. Annie relaxed and began to move with me, I began kissing her again very gently. Our movements were slow and full, her pussy gripped my cock like a glove. Jenny was kneeling beside us watching, and fingering herself. I could see her fingers pushing in between her pussy lips. The lips were glistening with her wetness and stretching around her fingers, as one then two fingers disappeared inside her.Annie said “All the pain is gone now! Your cock feels wonderful!” She was breathing harder. I sat back on my heels and drew Jenny’s head down to Annie’s tits. I concentrated on fucking Annie with slow intensity, and gradually building up speed. “Annie are you on the pill?” I asked she said “No!” and looked a bit scared, “Don’t worry” I said I can stop in time.
Jenny began licking and sucking on Annie’s incredible nipples, then kissing her lips. I put one hand on the bed to support myself and used the other to stroke her belly, tits and neck. Annie’s legs were around my waist. As she got more and more excited, she pulled me with her legs and thrust her pussy up against me as hard as she could. I kept the pace under control wanting to last, give her a good cum and not cum myself. Annie’s excitement became more intense; she was moaning and making inarticulate noises. Jenny put her arm under Annie’s neck and they kissed passionately. My thrusting strokes became longer and faster. The girls stopped kissing, Jenny went back to sucking Annie’s nipples and I could see her arm between her legs moving quickly back and forth. Annie was really close, writhing, thrusting up and down and moaning loudly. I wet my thumb and started flicking side to side against the top of her clit hood. Annie went into orgasm, bucking wildly, gasping and with both arms holding Jenny tight against her chest. I kept fucking her hard and flicking her clit, till she said “Stop, Stop!!”
I leaned down and gathered both girls into my arms. Annie lay there, spent. I withdrew from her, went and got a warm damp washcloth and gently wiped the blood and juices from her pussy, and also my cock.
Jenny got up onto her knees and looked at me with smouldering eyes. I fed my cock into her mouth. She slid her lips and tongue up and down a few times then said “Fuck me Geoff!” Jenny lay face down with a pillow under her hips and looked at me. I knelt with my legs outside of hers, her pussy was really wet and I shoved my cock into her. I lay over Jenny, put my arms under hers, grabbed her shoulders and began to fuck her. I was close to cumming very soon, I put my hands on top of her shoulders and straightened my knees. All my weight was on her, pushing her down on the bed as I fucked her hard and fast. My cock pounded into her over and over, Jenny was moaning loudly and pushing her arse up against me. As my orgasm approached, I felt Annie climb onto my back. She put her pussy against my bum and began thrusting in time with me, adding her strength to mine so that we both fucked Jenny together. This quickly pushed me over the edge, I shoved my cock in hard and held still, spurting my cum into her. Annie kept on humping against my bum causing a slight thrusting action into Jenny’s cunt. Jenny cried out and reached her peak as well.
As we calmed down I lifted my weight onto my elbows and craned my neck to look at Annie, she giggled and said “That was fun.” I laughed, Jenny made a puzzled sound, and I told her “Annie is piggybacking”. “What?” “She’s lying on my back, we were both fucking you”. Jenny got a fit of the giggles, so did Annie, it was like being in a warm vibrating pile of flesh. With both girls laughing and shaking, I started laughing as well and my half soft dick was jerking in Jenny’s pussy.
But I didn’t get hard again and after a little while Annie slid off me and I got off Jenny. We lay down with Annie in the middle and I pulled the sheet and blankets over us. Annie’s bum crack was wet and with my fingers I slid my soft dick into her crack. Annie said “Mmmmmm” and pushed back against me. Glancing at the clock I saw 11.30!! “Hey girls we better stop, you’re supposed to be home now!” There was a flurry of movement as they squealed and leapt out of bed. They panicked a bit but I told them to calm down, have a quick shower and be sure to dress properly. “You don’t want to get home in a mess and smelling of sex, do you.” I got dressed and when the girls were ready I checked out the front. A neighbour was walking by I called a greeting to let the girls know someone was there, then said “Plenty of stars out Jim, should be sunny tomorrow.” Jim agreed and went on to his house. I ducked back inside and hugged Jenny and Annie together. Annie threw her arms around my neck and said “Thanks, that was so amazing, I want to do it again.” “Well, I hope we can” I said, and kissed her like a lover. I looked into her eyes, and then kissed Jenny the same way. The coast was clear and the girls left quietly, I walked them to the gate and watched as the two most gorgeous girls I had ever been with walked away. At the corner they waved and were gone.
I reflected on my amazing day, with Jenny then both of them. A kaleidoscope of images of those two beauties ran through my thoughts as I changed the sheets, put the soaked ones in the wash basket, had a long shower and went to bed. A message came on my phone. First some pictures, Jenny and Annie’s smiling faces in one. Then a pair of breasts, followed by another pair of breasts, a bum, and another bum. Next a pussy in close up with legs together and another pussy, close up with legs spread wide apart. The message was “Can you guess which tits, arse and pussy belongs to which of us?” The tits were easy, Annie’s nipples being much larger. The rest took some thought, however Annie is a bigger girl and in one shot there was enough of the legs showing for a reasonable guess. Both pussies were shaved now so no easy clue with colour of pubes, but I thought Jenny was more likely to pose with her legs wide apart. I sent the pics back with names attached. Back came the reply “Two out of three hahaha” It was Annie’s pussy with her legs apart. I sent to them “Well my two darlings, next time I’ll take my own photos.”

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Fantasy

wendy’s day

Man was she a naughty woman. She actually gave me a handjob at my 18th birthday party. It was incredible and I can’t stop wanking over the thought of her.

Fiction

Megan and Kyle v2 – part 5

This is a re-edited version of my previous posting. I mainly cleaned up a bunch of spelling and grammar errors. I also clarified a couple of paragraphs. I hope you all enjoy it. Please provide feedback in the comment section.

Sex Joke

And On The Menu Today We Have…

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: – $1.50.
Chicken Sandwich: – $2.50.
Hand Job: – $10.00.
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.
“Yes?” she inquires with a knowing smile, “can I help you?”
“I was wondering”, whispers the man, “are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?”
“Yes”, she purrs, “indeed I am”
The man replies “Well wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich!”

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